Something happened this morning, it seems that some problem has occurred because of me.
Finally the thing is settled. But I still feel like something is wrong.
Since I've moved here, I never have one minute of passion to work.
Last time, when I was just a normal helpdesk agent, even though I was frustrated by my TL, I was still passionate with my work, I liked dealing with my users, I liked taking calls, I would still take the emails from the inbox and used all my effort to reply.
But now, I have to pull myself together very hard, then only can finish my work, and then the other round of the work is coming, like a routine, never ends, never stops.
Whenever you see somebody you know in anywhere, the standard question you will ask is "How are you?". For most of the people, they'll just simply answer "Good", "Fine", "Great" or anything, may not be really reflecting their current feeling. But for me, I really think about it before I answer. Good? Bad? Not good? Still OK? Still surviving? I'm not sure. Sometimes I just paused and mind goes blank, after a few seconds only answered. Weird huh? It's because I really don't know how I am now...
I like to work with my current boss, I like the freedom and flexibility that I have been given on my job, as long as I can finish my tasks on time, I'm free to do it in anyway. But... I still feel blank, lost, and...... don't know what am I doing...
How this bad feeling will last? I don't know. Just hope that I could find myself very soon so that I can be moving forward.
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真的很难想像，我这一天是怎么过来的。早上在新村看政府医生，下午匆匆吃个面就载了爸妈一起去KL同善，一直搞到5点才回家。然后，我“爽爽”地又去了一趟IOI City Mall买爸爸吃的五谷粉、血压计，“顺便”给自己买了一个我一直很想买却嫌贵的袋子犒劳自己。 一天下来，身心都很疲...
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Daddy, 今天是您的生忌。妈妈说，一切由她处理，就简单的拜祭就好，我们不需要特地请假。 当年，因为一些时间上的拖延，以致阿公和阿嫲没能及时在你出生当天去登记，日期也没有写准，所以您身份证上的出生日期没能放上正确的日期。阿嫲只记得您农历生日是四月初七，却不知道阳历... -
不知不觉，已经一年了。 在这一年期间，发生了疫情，来了个MCO，然后又RMCO，现在又CMCO。待在家6个多月，回了office一个月又被“赶”回家里。看着每天4位数的新确诊人数，感觉疫情已经控制不了。我们，还安全吗？ 这样一来，反倒感觉有点欣慰。因为爸妈不需要为疫情的爆发而...
2 comments:
we tend to have down mood sometimes. Don't think too much... relax and go for a short breakaway, if possible. Text me if you need someone listen to your ranting. I'm ready for it............
thanks dear for your warm message. I realize that life is full of challenge, we can't be defeated so easily. Have a deep breath, go to bed, tomorrow is a brand new day again.
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