今日份正能量：感恩时刻【一些唠嗑】

 

已经有好长一段时间没更博了，这里应该都织满蜘蛛网了吧。

我会突然想到更新这里，是因为今天吸收了太多的正能量，想好好地给自己记录一下。不过我这人天生比较话痨，所以篇数有点长。

追星的我

今年我喜欢了一位歌手：周深。已经远离饭圈十年的我，最近开始关注起他来。我以为，作为一个超过10年的追星一族，对很多事情应该已经看得很淡。结果昨晚因为一个热搜，把自己整忧郁了，整晚憋了一肚子气无处宣泄，只好不断地听着他的歌舒缓一下情绪。

今天一早，他发博了。当时是感动得想哭。他一直知道四周发生了什么，这种热度，只有他自己亲自来说才有效。他一句话比千千万万的粉丝说上千万句都有用。他一直都值得。整晚悬着的一颗心，终于落地了。

然后也是自我检讨的一天。我一把年纪，怎么还跟一个入世未深的小女孩一样容易被激怒？我经历过的事情也不少，怎么就学不会淡然呢？一个搅不动水花的黑子怎么就把我闹腾了一整晚？看来我真的要好好地反省一下。

工作的我

说到自己的三次元生活吧（网上学来的词）。最近的工作出现了一点点变化，团队面临重组，我们都需要去争取回到原来的岗位。我已经尽力（嗯……有吗？）把自己的履历写出来也提交了，接下来就是看命运了。

其实让我最感动的，是我在整理履历的过程中，接受到了一位朋友的帮助。她是我前同事，也是一名同胞。她之前一直有在帮我，但我其实没想到她这次也会帮忙。因为她已经升职了，而且现任工作也特别忙，没有固定工作时间而且时间还特别长。在我真的觉得无助的时候，她真的回复我了，而且也特别热心真的帮我一条一条地看然后教我这里应该要怎样改那里要怎么写。写申请原因的时候她还直接帮我修改了我的整个段落。我当时的内心是很激动的，毕竟她其实跟我不算很要好的朋友，平时也没什么联络，就偶尔通个短信什么的。但当我真正需要帮助的时候，她却真的在尽心尽力的帮我。我很感激，也很感动。我之前对她的印象还不太好，但说到这一点，她甚至是比我自己的老板还要上心。感觉如果我不努力倒还有点对不起她。

还是追星的我

作为Super Junior十年的老精灵（中国叫“妖精”但我其实不太喜欢称自己为“妖”，更何况ELF也不是妖，看魔戒里的精灵族多漂亮啊！），今天（11月6日）是SJ出道15周年的好日子！

想起当年刚“入坑”的时候，做数据、打榜、投票什么都学，当然也没学太会。专辑几乎没落下过，周边也有买，他们的节目、采访、舞台、MV、饭拍、直拍、直播、广告……一个一个地看，没日没夜地追。我早前开的微博已经在养蘑菇，但也挖出来追星了。还开了QQ、微信、入驻B站、Naver、加入粉丝群……也是第一次，演唱会从最远的山顶、买到最贵的前排（这还真没人知道）。后来热度开始消退，没有这么疯狂了。但本着还是对他们的喜爱，专辑还是会买，只是会买主要的专辑，小分队和日专也是觉得好听才买。他们的节目还是会看，但最近就看少了，连他们的团综像SJ Return、SJ TV 也有很多落下没看完的。但最近看到他们9个人合体，也还是很激动的。

10年前追星，知道了一个叫“饭圈”的圈子。当时还认识了几个来自中国、台湾和同在马来西亚的粉丝，我们私下开了一个群开始唠嗑。可惜后来时间一久，彼此有自己的生活，有人结婚生子去了，有的已经爬了墙，再说当时因为成员的原因还出了一些矛盾，所以隔没几个月就再也没联系了。是有点可惜，但那也是我唯一参加过的“饭圈”。一直以来，我都是solo追星，没有小伙伴，也没有好基友。就自己一个人，蛮孤独，却也蛮自由的。

追了韩星这么久最失败的是我的韩语没一点进步。从一开始的anyeong haseyo到现在懂得的单词不到20个，最厉害的只是对方讲话的时候听得出是在讲韩语……然后当年熬夜打榜所养成的习惯到现在都没有变（养成的是熬夜不是打榜），而且还有变本加厉的趋向。

本来，追星其中一个目的，就是希望自己能变成更好的人。无可否认我是一个“好人”（嗯……有质疑吗？），但更好的话也不至于。不过，我所喜欢的人都是很优秀的人，希望我能够学习到他们的正能量和对待生活、对待亲友和对待职业的态度吧。

人生有好多好多的不如意。我觉得人生就像是 Super Mario 游戏一样，在你跑向终点的过程中会不断地出现很多敌人和障碍，或是大坑或是吃人花还有很多会攻击人的乌龟等。但如果你想抵达终点，就得一个个地冲破这些难关，然后寻找你的蘑菇，让自己变得更强大。

想记录下现在的心情主要就是想自己永远记住要感恩吧。然后，要永远保持一颗平和的心，别像个小孩一样焦躁，成年人要有成年人的样子，尤其是被现实暴打过的社畜。最难的日子我都经历过了，还有什么坎，我是过不了的吗？

“离家出走”

说起来这有点疯狂。一把年纪才来一个不辞而别。
不过，这“不辞而别”也只维持了三个多小时。
一直以来，我都不知道自己是一个什么样的人。
的确有很多时候都很不成熟。
但需要的时候还是可以自己一个人撑起很多事，完成很多事情。
在其他人都没有勇气的时候，是我站出来去处理。
在医院的时候是这样，面对父母的时候是这样。
只是，很多时候，我还是一个任性的小女生。
至少，在我家“大人”眼里是这样。
或许，我的确是有点任性了。

换了件衣服，提了我的包，拿了车钥匙，就这样，我没有跟任何一个人答话，开着车离开了家。
从家里开始，我就一直不断地流泪。
不是我小家子气，其实也不是什么大不了的事情。
只是当时情绪一下子涌上来我止也止不住。
可能我真的是压抑了太久。
自己一个人在车里的时候，我终于放肆大哭起来。
哭得抽搐，哭得撕心裂肺。
爸爸从出事到现在，即使是离开的那一刹那，我都没有哭成这样。
我哭得停不下来，我没有压抑自己，让自己放声哭喊。
我不管四周是不是有人看得见，我也没心思去管其他的人。
我也许只是需要一个让情绪宣泄的出口。

爸出事之后，我也有在车里哭过。但从来没有一次哭得这么凄厉，哭得这么久。
好像一个锁不上的水龙头，我就是停不出来。
差不多有半个小时，我就这样一直哭一直哭，直到没有哭出声音但眼泪还是一直掉。

我一个人边哭边开车到商场，在停车场里面把车停好之后在车里坐了很久。
坐着坐着开始刷手机然后刷到鹿晗公布恋情微博挂了。
坐了差不多15分钟，我走到商场。
一个人，漫无目的，在商场里面逛来逛去。
到一家日式餐馆，第一次进去的地方却碰上他们系统故障，不知道是我运气不好还是他们运气不好。
总之还是填饱了肚子出来继续逛。
走着走着心情开始平复了下来。

我其实也没有跟任何人过不去。
我心里感觉委屈却知道妈比谁都心疼我。
我这样“不辞而别”他们大概也知道发生了什么事。
我回家之后也没有跟任何人对话。
算了，没有任何人需要道歉。就这样吧。
反正我也只是不想让他们看到我这个样子。
有事，以后再说吧。

Stay Strong and Move Forward

It's quite some time since my last update.
It was really a tough conversation. "Tough" as in what we were talking about seems really upsetting. We feel each other, we feel the same.
When someone trying so hard to proof that you are useless, sometimes I even agreed with them. Ya... maybe I didn't work hard enough.
But it's just wasn't me. I used to be so strong to get through all the storms and hard times.
For those who know what I've been through, it wasn't easy for me throughout the decade.
I used to believe that I'm kinda strong person, until 2 years ago someone commented me that I'm not resilience and adaptable.
It was the darkest time for me, after that, it seems that I can walk into any storm. Even though the person still keep on trying to pull me down.
I think I'm not so assertive sometimes to stand on my own feet and keep it strong enough to fight against negative things.
I believe I can find my way out.

Some thoughts

It's sad that when you have added too many friends in your Facebook, you need to be very careful when you are posting your words, because all of your friends, colleagues, family members, relatives, etc. will all see what you have posted. It happened that, I posted a picture where my car got hit and bent, not long later, my aunt called my mom and asked what happened. Actually I wouldn't have posted if I didn't want my family to know, but I just thought of telling them after I settled everything. I didn't expect the words were spread so fast.

Now even if I'm really emotional and wanted to put something on to vent out my stress, I have to think twice, triple, or forever. Either I limit the view to closed friends only, or I exclude somebody or some group of people from the viewing it, or I don't post at all.

I know it's immature to vent out my own feeling online, especially negative ones. But sometimes when the emotion comes you really can't help it. I used to be someone with resilience and endurance, but now things change, somewhere went wrong that those things I used to be proud of doesn't exist anymore and it's getting lesser and lesser at times.

But I'm still consider myself as resilient. As, you know, I need to survive. I've been through so much of hardship, working in a difficult environment for more than a decade, what else I can't tolerate? Emotion comes, but it could be absorbed and vanished. Life goes on, don't let emotion controls you, you have to deal with it.

Nobody can challenge me except myself. I have to find my way out or get stuck inside.

My Throwback of 2016

My journey in 2016 didn't start good at the beginning. But after I finally got myself back on, I managed to do things better. It ended quite... well... actually not bad, I won't say it's perfectly fine, at least it has improved from what I expected.

I had 2 overseas trip this year, HK & TW. Both are not budget trip, considering the spending I had for the trip or in the country. However it was fun and I would think it worth the money I spent. There are some moments money can't buy. Next year I hope that I can travel more and hopefully it'll more more budget.

For games, I'm still playing my Candy Crush Soda and Farmville 2. I realized that I played Criminal Mind a lot last year but stopped since Sep. After that I'm getting into Pokemon Go. Anyhow I'm not a hardcore player, not a good player also.

I'm a fan for Super Junior, and like some of the Korean groups and songs. This year I started to like EXO. Not a diehard fan, but started to follow their news, watch their shows, listen to their songs and buy their albums. Nothing special, just because I like the songs.

Here are some of the important things happened last year. I will have a review of my last year resolution after this and see how far I went.

Psycho neighbour

My family seriously disturbed by the psycho neighbor in the beginning of the year. He just moved in a few months but kept on making loud and disturbing noise like dragging the table and chair, bouncing balls (sounds like iron ball) on the floor, banging the wall...... it was so disturbing until we almost went mad. We tried so many ways to stop him, including banging back from our end (ya it's a stupid way) but it didn't work. Actually we should have talked to them but based on our past experience dealing with him, we decided not to confront him. Luckily they finally moved out and we got back our peace.

2016-01 Doomed News

After the result, it was almost my doom day because it's really out of my expectation. But I managed to pull myself together and keep moving on. It wasn't easy. But you may also say it's because I didn't have other choice. Anyhow I can take it as my resilience achievement. I don't expect the same thing happen again next year, if it does, I'll consider to make a move this time.

2016-01-19 Pre-CNY Dinner （收工酒）

这是一个没有“酒”的收工“酒”

I used to have dinner with my buddies every year before CNY (Chinese New Year). But there are less people joined year by year, and this year, another 2 are leaving. So next year I'm not sure we will still have the dinner or not. Anyhow it's a good memory to me.

2016-02-13 Gathering of friends from Primary School

These are my primary schoolmates, last time we met was around 10 years ago I believe. It's not easy to get everybody together. And.... all of them are married... 😅

2016-02-25 Gathering of S3Science Girls

Another gathering, where 4 of us are being together. We were from 高三理 (Senior 3 Science) when we were in school. That time only 6 girls in a class. Very precious. But it's very difficult to get everybody together nowadays. And, again, they're all married. 😢

2016-04-13 Shell Safety Day

Shell Safety Day 2016, PDRM K9 unit brought police dogs along. First time taking photo so close with fierce animal. He's actually very cute~~~ ♥️

2016-04-21 Car Breakdown at Dpulze

Link to the story: A story about car breakdown

I would say it is another bad day for me of the year where my car suddenly couldn't start up at night inside a carpark of a shopping mall (Dpulze), and it's almost 10pm when the mall was going to close. Luckily I managed to call my colleague for help. After that I've learned that you always need to get your car serviced or checked on time. Or... don't go out at night alone.

2016-05-21 Photo with 林德荣

First of all I'm not his fan. But I quite like this DJ when I used to listen to MYFM. I met him in the airport playground when he's with his family. He was so friendly, when I greeted him and asked if I can take photo with him, he actually took my phone and took a selfie.

2016-05-26 New Phone

I bought a new phone before my existing phone broke down. And this time I purposely go for a quite high-end one: Mi Note. A 64GB phone and costs me > RM1500. Anyway I never regret, I love the huge capacity and HD camera, I brought it to my HK & TW trip and it so far didn't let me down. I still got half of the storage inside.

2016-05-28 SBO Superhero Run & Family Carnival

This year the Shell run and the family day (family carnival) are on the same day. And what happened was, after a 8km run (walk), I cramped my ankle and I could hardly walk. Because of that, my parents and nephew have to hold on with me, they didn't walk much or play much this time. Next year if we have family day again I won't join the run together.

2016-06-10 to 12 Trip to Hong Kong

Album: 2016-06 My Footsteps in Hong Kong

My first time going HK with my friend, a very short trip because my friend just go there for Beyond's concert. Many says it doesn't worth it but at least I stepped in to the country. I have no regrets and I met my HK friends. Actually I've been to many landmarks in HK already so what else do I expect?

Pokemon Go

The fever of Pokemon Go started this year. At the beginning I thought of not playing it but later on I couldn't stand the "itchy hand" to start on the game. What happen next.... is that I'm still playing now even if others have stopped 😂. Anyway I'm not a hardcore player, I just play as and when I feel like want to catch anything or I'm bored. I'm still in very low level but I'm fine with it. The fever of Pokemon Go doesn't last long, now many people are feeling bored and the players are getting lesser and lesser now.

2016-08 Rio Olympics

Rio Olympics 2016 happened in August. Where our Datuk Lee still couldn't get his first gold medal in Olympics game, but he won the support from the nation and fans from other countries. He is doing very well, just it's not his time. But his game with Lin Dan is the best.

2016-08-08 MYSG Commercial Fleet Away Day

Coaches were invited to MYSGCF Away Day and facilitate for the Treasure Hunt game. It was fun although it's quite tiring. And still... I hate doing make-ups..... 

2016-09-04 Gala Dinner

Annual CSC dinner, CSE team has played a sketch. Quite short but funny. Not used to perform on stage but it was a good experience.

2016-08-18 CSE Away Day

Last year, our team had our 2D1N Away Day at Port Dickson Grand Lexis hotel, this year, pathetically... we only had a half day event in Putrajaya Pullman Hotel. Not so special actually but at least.... it's an Away Day. 😜

2016-09-15 Hair Cut

I cut my hair short (not so short, just shoulder length...) after... don't know how long.

2016-10-22 Zumba Party

First time ever, I went for a Zumba party with my office friends. I joined Zumba dance for 1 or 2 years already 

2016-10-30 One Day Trip

I went to a 1D trip with my parents, but I also don't know where I went... the most I remembered was I had a quite good but long-waited Ulu Yam Loh Mee.

2016-11-19 Alex Retirement Dinner

My boss/manager Alex retired this year, and we had a dinner in a restaurant at Cyberjaya Resort. After 30+ years of service he could end his journey completely in Shell. It's one of my goal too. But, how much longer I can stay in here?

2016-12-14 to 19 Trip to Taiwan (Taipei)

FB Album: Journey in Taipei @ 2016Dec 2016年末之旅 - 臺北

Before end of the year, I had my final trip overseas with my best buddy and her family. It is definitely not a "budget" trip, but at least I enjoyed the moment with them and I had been most of the must-go places in Taipei. This year all my overseas trip are not budget at all, but still, no regrets. Sometimes things cannot be perfect, you just need to enjoy the moment whenever you have the chance.

My Throwback of 2015

I've actually wrote a review in my Chinese blog. So I don't really know what to write in here. And I found that I didn't post my review of 2014. I'm still thinking if I want to publish it. :P

The biggest changes of 2015 will definitely be the Kinga. What is Kinga? Actually it's just a name for our team's reorganization. After the Kinga, the team has been shuffled, some of us stay, some of us left, and new people joined. Honestly speaking, I'm still not really getting used to the new ways of working. It seems that I still got a lot to catch up. 

I didn't really travel anywhere this year, just the nearest Sekinchan, Setiawan, Pulau Kukup. Most of them are local trips. The only trip I had to Singapore is because my aunt's funeral.

It's difficult to describe everything, just use the photos to list down what I've done for the year 2015:

2015-04-18 Michael Wong Concert

2015-05-02 Qin Xin Lin 清心岭

2015-05-02 Setiawan

2015-05-24 Sg. Chilling Waterfall

2015-07-11 & 12 Pulau Kukup 

2015-08-22 CSE Away Day - Grand Lexis Port Dickson

2015-11-10 Sekinchan

First visit @ Tous les Jours: Disappointed

This is a famous "French-Asian" bakery n South Korea. Why I know this bakery? Because in South Korea, one of the owner is Eunhyuk (Lee Hyuk-Jae), member of Super Junior. And obviously as you might know, that's the reason why I was so long for this shop and extremely excited when I knew that it'd be opened in the middle of the golden triangle at Bukit Bintang area.

First step into the shop, I was impressed by the greeting "anyeong haseyo" from the staffs. And actually I like the smiles on their faces, and their friendliness when talking with the customers. It was a very different environment and atmosphere, I felt like going into another world from a busy city. The warm interior, nice decorations, nice bakeries, the aroma of the bread and coffee.... all so impressive ----- until how I really experienced their real service: the food and how it's served.

I took a bread and ordered an iced mocha from the counter, they gave me a number for the coffee. And then, I waited at my table for more than 20 minutes, the drink is not served!!! When I asked one of the staff (waiter?) around, THEY CAN'T SPEAK ENGLISH!!!! OK, I'm not discriminating, but can you at least get somebody who can understand what I'm saying?? Don't tell me they are from Korea, I bet they don't understand Korean too!

So after waiting for another 10 minutes, I lost my patience and went to the counter, where somebody made the coffee behind. When I checked with one of them about my order, I was shocked that they just started making my drink!! And moreover, the staff asked me a few times about my order, when the guy asked me for the last time if it's hot or cold, I repeated don't know how many times and I almost shouted out: ICED MOCHA!! A few people looked at my side, but I don't care, I was so pissed at that moment, just let them know they have an angry customer here. After I grabbed my drink, I just turned myself straight to the door, ignored those who said sorry and thank you to me.

And the coffee... sorry you can say that I'm not a coffee lover or don't know how to appreciate real coffee. I just simply don't like the taste. As they charged me same price as Starbucks, I can say their service quality and the taste is far far behind.

I know I was a bit harsh to them and some of them they're just innocent, it's not their fault for can't speak English. But it's the owner who needs to take responsibility of their service and quality. First of all I don't mind they hire foreigner, but as the foreign workers can even speak Cantonese and Hakka in the traditional Chinese kopitiam, I don't see a reason why they can't even understand simple English. If I'm going to pay 10 times higher than that here, I would like to see some difference.

Actually I went there because of someone I like, but since they have no connection to each other, I won't really feel like want to come back here for the second time.

p/s: Anyhow, the bread I bought was quite ok, just it's too expensive, RM6.50 for that.

Anyone who wants to know more about this shop, can go to their Malaysia Facebook page:
https://www.facebook.com/TLJMalaysia

More information about Tous les Jours in Wiki:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tous_Les_Jours

A surprised greeting from my neighbour

As I said before, I have a very strange neighbour. They were nice at the beginning and talked to us before they moved in. And one day during their renovation, the lady's dad and my dad somehow had something unhappy happened within, and after my dad complained when he came back home, we realized that the relationship as a neighbour has broken between us. Actually I don't know what happened, the most innocent for me is, I didn't even say a single word with anyone of them.

We never talked to each other for more than a year, not even a single greeting. We pretend not to see each other although we meet everyday. Both of our families have babies at home, I'm a bit worried about how the young ones are going to get along with each other in the future.

Just this morning, when I was hanging clothes, I heard somebody talked to me. I was actually shocked when I saw her and realized that she was talking to me. She told me that their awning has been removed and will be replaced with a new one, the renovation will take about a week, so she is sorry for the dusty or our room may get wet when it rains.Believe me, I was really surprised when she said that to me, and she looked nice with smiley face when talking to me and I almost forgot that we never talked to each other before. And in fact, this is the very FIRST time we talked. So of course, I responded with a BIG SMILE together with "Nevermind!" "no worries!".

I never thought that we could have conversations with each other, so this has really made my DAY~~ I'm not sure what's gonna happen from today onwards but I really hope that this can be the "break the ice" between our families, I don't want to let the 3rd generations in our family become strangers afterall.

PC Fair, Apr 2011

I always show up in the PC Fair, although I usually go alone.
Being left behind by the latest technology for so many years, actually I don't really catch up with the new things. Don't ask me what's the latest processor, what's the best specs of laptop or PC, what are the features, what's the latest model...... OK, I'm out of it.

Visiting PC Fair has been my habit since college. I don't know any technical thing anymore, but I still like to see those machines, and see new things. I enjoy seeing those hot girls standing around showing their new products, I like to see the promoters demonstrating their latest technology, although I don't really understand. If I don't understand then why I like it? I don't know how to explain. Just..... like it.

I'll still keep on visiting PC Fair, and you may see me in there someday... :)

How are you?

Something happened this morning, it seems that some problem has occurred because of me.
Finally the thing is settled. But I still feel like something is wrong.
Since I've moved here, I never have one minute of passion to work.
Last time, when I was just a normal helpdesk agent, even though I was frustrated by my TL, I was still passionate with my work, I liked dealing with my users, I liked taking calls, I would still take the emails from the inbox and used all my effort to reply.
But now, I have to pull myself together very hard, then only can finish my work, and then the other round of the work is coming, like a routine, never ends, never stops.

Whenever you see somebody you know in anywhere, the standard question you will ask is "How are you?". For most of the people, they'll just simply answer "Good", "Fine", "Great" or anything, may not be really reflecting their current feeling. But for me, I really think about it before I answer. Good? Bad? Not good? Still OK? Still surviving? I'm not sure. Sometimes I just paused and mind goes blank, after a few seconds only answered. Weird huh? It's because I really don't know how I am now...

I like to work with my current boss, I like the freedom and flexibility that I have been given on my job, as long as I can finish my tasks on time, I'm free to do it in anyway. But... I still feel blank, lost, and...... don't know what am I doing...

How this bad feeling will last? I don't know. Just hope that I could find myself very soon so that I can be moving forward.

lunch@oldtown

I was having lunch alone today at old town Cyber today, and just on time when they were having lion dance show there. Usually I will bring along my camera, but this time, I didn't.


It's the 9th day of CNY, mainly for the Hokkien to offer prayers to the Jade Emperor of Heaven (天宮), traditionally it's the birthday of the Jade Emperor. Last night the sound of fireworks was so loud until it scared my nephew.

After lunch, when I want to drive back to the office, one fella blocked my way, he wanted to take my parking space, and he's followed by another car behind. Since he 'insisted' to park here, at the end I have to move forward and backward so many  times then only could move out from the space. Imagine there is a Benz on your left, a Kerisa at the back, and another car on the right, all of them just less than 2~3 feet away. Oh gosh, they are really testing my driving skill. The worst thing is I'm driving a manual car without power steering. After I returned back to the office, I still feel my arms were shaking.

5th Day Off

Starting from last Friday, it's the 5th day of my 'holiday'.

1 week, for some people, is considered very long. But for me, the longest 'holiday' I had was 6 months, it was when I just graduated from college. So, 1 week... not really long for me.

Anyhow, this one week is just a break time for me. Call to an end to one position, and ready to start for another. I'm still not really confident about my new post, but it doesn't need to be too worry about it. I just need to take a rest and just take whatever comes to me.

5 years in CRM, is the longest period I had in my career in one single team. I would say I'm still like the job (simply just be a helpdesk agent), but I can't just stay in one place forever, I have to move forward.

I don't have any specific plan in the remaining days. Maybe just staying with my PC and keep myself on the line.... haha... really wasting time huh?

Wish for health

Just back from the hospital. My nephew had entered the hospital again, high fever, fit, vomit. Luckily the paed said he doesn't need to admit to hospital, just gave him some medicine and we can take care of him at home.

This morning, received a SMS from my best friend, my 契女 had admitted to hospital again because of blue-ish on her body. The doctor is still checking for the problem. I'm still worrying about them since I received the message. They have been gone through so many hard times, and now they have to face it again.

Anyhow, for both Boy Boy and Girl Girl, since it's Christmas Eve today, I would like to make a wish for their recovery and health forever. Also, wish for health to everybody I love and who loves me.

Back to the beginning

People come, people go.
Things changed before you are aware of it.
When there is no sign of change, and you won't be able to track back how it's changed.
What you can do is keep on moving forward.
There is nothing you can do to turn back time, or even find out what had happened.
Maybe there are something we shouldn't do or say,
but... who would predict what would happen?
Maybe there are more than one cause, however it's not what I'm concerning.
Don't worry, I'm fine.
It's just back to the old times, I just need some time to get used to it again.

In the office

It's already 7:30pm, raining outside.

Just browse through some of my friends blogs and statuses (you-know-where), I found that they are really brave to write the things from their work, actually some of them are complains or negative feeling about something or somebody.

For me, I don't dare to do so as many people can access to my pages and blogs, even if not my direct superior, my friend can tell my colleague, and my colleague can tell my boss...... there are a large network over here, who knows at the end where the message will be flowed to?

Yet, it doesn't mean that I will never complain or I'm too comfortable with my work. I feel stressed also, have to deal with so many people everyday, handling some difficult requests, and deal with some VIP people, lost in the 'pool' side and lost in way don't know how to proceed...... and everyday after work, I feel very very tired and exhausted.

One of my old time lunch buddy will travel to Netherland for business trip. How good is that? I always wish to travel but until my age I still never step on a plane. Sad~~! Everyday work work work but at the end still cannot get a flight ticket.

It's time to go home now, will travel to Ipoh tomorrow. Hopefully I will have a nice journey.

Hike! Hike! Hike!

The government has caught the nation by announcing the petrol hike again. This time, sugar is the 'bonus', no subsidy for petrol Ron97 is another surprise from them. They said the cut is not expected to drive up inflation, but what we see in our own eyes, is that all the prices are getting higher and higher, it's a chain reaction.

Today I went to KL, the parking fee at Star Hill has been raised up from RM5 to RM7. It's a 40% increment! Do you think anybody can complain about it? Who is going to pay for our burden and lost? Who is going to responsible for our cost living that is getting higher and higher? Did they ever consider about it?

Now I have to think of another better parking area, hopefully I don't need to pay so much... but how about the groceries price? I really worry about our future.

Sick... again

I had got a 'perfect attendance' award in 2008. Never had sick leave for a year. Now, no more. Today I take another day of MC just within 6 moonths.

I don't know what is the cause of the problem, maybe I did have a very bad eating habit, like always OT and stayed in the office until over my dinner time, and went back home no more appetite.

I had only vomited twice very seriously as far as I remember (maybe after I graduated from school?), the first time was in a few years back, when I started to hurt my stomach by not eating well. That time when I felt sick, I could hardly eat anything, even drank water would make me vomited. That was a very terrible experience in my life. Now, second time. I threw up almost everything I had put into my mouth at dinner. But actually I didn't really eat anything.

Today, I slept for almost the whole day. Got high fever in the afternoon while I was taking a nap, but when I woke up, the heat was gone... I really don't know if tomorrow I still can go to work, but I think I'm feeling better now, hopefully tomorrow I'll have more energy to work.

And I try not to OT again.

Traveling dream

My sister and brother-in-law just came back from China trip, they were sharing their experience so happily until I also felt like want to buy a ticket and fly to China right away, but of course, it is impossible.

It’s always not easy for me to travel overseas, I might have chances before but I missed it. Until now I still haven’t taken a flight yet. There are many reasons like time, partners, budget that had stopped me from going travel. Maybe I should buy gold bullion for investment to increase my income, and then I should have more budgets to travel around the world.

A rest on Friday

This is my RL. My friend asked me, how could I take leave as I'm so busy.

"Busy cannot take leave ah?"

Haha...

I can see that they are quite independent now.

I still don't know how to tell T about my move... I wonder how he will respond.

Anyhow, everything is just at the beginning. Wait until everything is confirmed first, then we will know what's next.

* RL = replacement leave *

Saturday night (actually is Sunday early morning)...

My brother is attending his friend's wedding in other state, so I have the chance to use the internet today as I usually not allowed to.

I missed my last JP class in 2009 last week because of my best friend's wedding. Next class, will be next year. Which means that, I'll be 'free' for these few Saturdays.

Just had my blood test this morning, have to use the coupon before end of this year. The lady had inserted the needle into my arms twice. It's quite hurt... for me.

I'm watching the "Twightlight" over and over again. It's been a year since this movie was first on cinema. Previously, I don't understand why the second episode of this movie can be so popular, but now I know. After you have watched the first story, you can't wait to see how the story goes. I'll see it, maybe tomorrow?